Tuesday, April 26, 2011


Today I just lost a friend. and it feels like being slapped for a hundred times. Ouch!

Thank you for the bad mouthing behind my back, after these while. you're forgiven.

and thank you for everything.

Sorry for the things I've done to you accidentally and vice versa. from the bottom of my heart, I seek forgiveness, for I may not be perfect too.

Indeed, it's true when one says life is touch and go. the ones that matters stay.

Up until now I'm not sure why you seemed to hated me that much. urm. 

If it is about him. Well, to be honest, I love him. I love him. I love him. Yeh! I don't know what the future holds for both of us, but I love him. and if you were a good friend, you would have at least support me or him.

No worries, you can smile now, 'cause it's over between me and him.

but like I said before, "Untuk menjaga hati satu dunia, you decided to hurt the ones you loved" 

It's pretty normal actually. best of luck! :)

Silly, I even told everyone, I'm the happiest person on earth today.

Kota Cinta

As promised :)
Je vais aller à Paris du 26 avril jusqu'au 2 mai. Excusez-moi, de ne pas dire plus tôt vous les gars, c'était vraiment impromptu. prierpour mon salut. prendre soin et vous manquez les gars.

au revoir

beaucoup d'amour,

image source: google


Dearest readers,

Sorry for having to make this blog private again. for this time, I'd open only to friends and family members. Feel free to PM me your email addresses for invitation. Until I sort things out, let it be only me and you can read this. Sorry again for having to do this once again.

Lain yang di seru, lain yang datang, padan muka sendiri! Sigh :(

Monday, April 25, 2011

Junior MasterChef Australia

I'm not a couch potato kind of person. I don't really watch TV that much. this is because most of the time, my Mom would have the control of the TV and I'd rather download it and watch it at the computer.

But yesterday I watched the finale of the Junior MasterChef Australia season 1. I've been following on and off 'cause I'd rather not watch it while I'm starving or I might call Dominos for a large pizza. but yesterday was the finale and I'm so impressed with these kids all under the age of 13.  Yeh it is really about the love for the food, but the love for the food is one thing, the other thing is, you really need to have passion in cooking and the urge of wanting to cook and bake. oh creativity is the other, but it will come later, and in anything that you do, practice does make perfect! uh! I lovelovelove these kids and Isabella or they called her Izzy deserved the title of the 1st Junior MasterChef Australia EVER! but it was really a neck to neck competition between her and Jack.  I love when Jack said "Even though it is only a competition, we are friends now and after this, we are still going to be friends. awwww~

Izzy has a twin sister who is also in the competition, named Sofie. but she did not make it through the finale. and when she was asked by the judge what is the most memorable moment in this competition, and she'd say that seeing her sister, Izzy got through the finale was the most memorable moment in this competition. Awwww again~

They are really all good cooks. and I really wanted to be like them. at least if not a top chef at a restaurant, at least I could cook some really good food for my family at home. You reckon?

Today, my sister decided to make homemade roti canai. I remembered when arwah moyang was still alive, she'd teach us how to make one and karipap (my favourite) as well. making roti canai wans't that easy. I almost give up when I first attempted it but like I said, practice does make perfect! Well, it doesn't really that perfect but when you get the final product, and when everyone is enjoying eating it despite they were all very hungry, I know that, I won't starve my family to death and I could make something to eat, even though it wasn't really that healthy of a food, (tepung dan lots of minyak) but I know I could make something. and oh! if you are wondering, No, we do not tebar like the mamak, we find a big dulang and stretch it all over the dulang. It was really fun I tell you! :P

Roti Canai anyone?

Let's not stop there aites? Let's learn how to cook more yummy food. thanks to Mummy :)

If these kids can do! So can I! :P

gentle breeze, would you do me a favor?

2010, 2000 & 2007

These numbers, in a way has a similarity, a special place in my heart. 


Happiness is like peeing in your own pants, only you can feel the warmth.


Friday, April 22, 2011

Book Fair 2011

I reckon "Reading books is sexy, drinking coffee is cool; thus reading books while drinking coffee is super sexy and super cool" :)

I can get pretty high when it comes to bookstores and books, even if it's only sitting and staring at piles of books and uh uh uh smelling the smell of old and new books can get super exciting too. That is why I'm looking forward for today because of this:

Throughout my super tiny observation, to be a book lover, one must be trained from a very young age. If you want your children to love being around books, I'm not talking about academic books, I'm talking general, you must train your child to love books. That includes, buying books for them, reading it for them, making it a fun thing to do, spending times with them and books, setting a good example to them by taking your own sweet time, reading books and oh! when you are going out, going to the bookstore or book fair too could help. Suka membaca amalan/ budaya kita. 

Today I went to PWTC to be a part of the book fair 2011. It was super awesome I tell you. Of course you have some advantages and disadvantages going there at the early stage of the fair but to tell you the truth if I have all the time in the world I would go there everyday. I remembered going there with my family and met the ever famous A. Samad Said. So I'm calling all the book lovers and Malaysians to be a part of the experience. Sure, you'll have loads of FUN!

Besides, wanting to check out what's in store, and buying a list of books, I went there to meet BFF from Penang, Sen. She's working there part time. Last time, I met her was at Malacca, February. So if you happen to go there and meet her, just tell her, you're a friend of mine, and please ask for a discount, just kidding.

I'm not going to blog on books I've bought nor things I did there, go check it out yourself, but despite of the tiredness of jumping from one counter to another, riding the KOMUTER from UKM-Putra station, I had fun and thanks to my sister for the accompany.

PS You can get pretty 'lost' inside the fair among the piles of books, if you get what I mean. :P So please make sure you have your maps with you and don't be ashame to ask for direction! Good Luck! :)

To tell you a secret, I love man who reads, besides my Dad, I think you are super sexy when you read.

So guys, what's your favorite book ever? :)


You know how I'd always tell people that love, but never expect anything in return.

'Cause when in doubt, love.

At least, when you're not expecting something in return, it won't hurt that much, it somehow make sense for me~

Yeah! It's easier said than done.

'Cause in every girls' mind, when she loves someone dearly, she'd hope that one particular someone will love her too, that he will feel the same way. He loves me, he loves me not?

To me, I've finally got my answer. whether it was right or wrong, whether hearing it from him, himself or not, a dear friend of his told me a little story, a story that made me stop running for awhile, catch a deep breath and said to myself, "I knew it, I knew it from the start"

I don't know what the future holds for us.

If it was love back then, and if it's still is, that's enough for me.

"Kalau ada jodoh, ada lah, kalau tak ada, takpe" 

Thursday, April 21, 2011

mari mengaji


Ugly Truth

I love blogging. I really do. That's why when I have to put this blog under construction for a month or so, I felt dead. It's not that I don't have anything else better to do, it is that, I felt like my soul isn't here with me. My history of blogging has been so private that nobody else know about my previous blogs. I just wrote anything that I felt back then, re-read it once again and delete it and never return. It was really a nice feeling.

I always been a child who is not really good in voicing out my thoughts in particular, my feelings, even though it can be quite obvious I think if I'm mad, or sad or even in love, but to whom?. I always write it down and hoping one day I'd misplace it and it landed on you~ to you. and of course, things like that don't always happen to you by chance, but I'm just making sure, that I've made it very clear, and you don't have to misunderstood me again.

Well, the best part of blogging is that I always get love letters from strangers saying Keep it up! I like the way you blog. It was really a nice warmth feeling inside, God knows. Even though, I may write it to address one particular person, and even though that one particular person doesn't read it and probably doesn't bother, there is always person out there who is feeling me. and that is alright.

I have a friend named A, he's a long lost friend, met him again early this year to find out that after this while he used to go to the same school as him. I did not let it out at first but after being friends with him I finally let it out.

"You reminded me of someone I used to know"


"Your senior back at school"

And you know how I like putting up fb status to again, addressing people, in general. and I know it can be pretty annoying sometimes. but most of the times, people just misunderstand it. and of course it hurts. and once again A reminded me that these days my fb status can be related to him and his so called love life, in a way. Oh A, good luck in your life and thanks again for liking the way that I write or expressing out things in certain way. thanks again.

It's ok that you don't read it, It's ok that you don't bother. at least years from now, I don't look back and say things like "Hye, I should have said that before"

anyhow, I'm not being feminism nor anti-lelaki. Don't get me wrong, I sometimes hate girls for being manipulative and oh! I do love men. but these few days I've been reading articles on how they said that Do not say those 3 words to girls ONLY because it will drive them crazy due to that they will act crazy. fyi, don't say those 3 words to anyone else if you don't mean it, not only to girls! and heck! if we (girls) say those 3 words to guys, what will that happen? guys will act cool and play dumb? let's try, shall we?

"Aku suka kau juga sampai mati!"

How's that? OK, that is certainly not 3-words but..

feminism enough, no?

This is everything from the heart, whether you like it or not, I'll take that as a compliment *wink*

Wednesday, April 20, 2011


If you think that the first time was hard, do you possibly think that the second time would be easier? 

Try Harder lah Sayang! You can do it! I know you can! :P

Tuesday, April 19, 2011


I hate the way you talk to me,

and the way you cut your hair.

I hate the way you drive my car,

I hate it when you stare.

I hate your big dumb combat boots,

and the way you read my mind.

I hate you so much it makes me sick,

it even makes me rhyme.

I hate the way you're always right,

I hate it when you lie.

I hate it when you make me laugh,

Even worse when you make me cry.

I hate it when you're not around,

and the fact that you didn't call.

But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you,

not even close..

not even a little bit..

not even at all.

Just For Fun

I was chatting with BFF in Penang just now on lives, humans and how to educate people like me who is;

kalau push sangat, nanti berontak
kalau ignore je, nanti lalai

so, We ended up agree that people need to be pushy sometimes, and yeh we could not push people to be or to think like us and yeah sometimes we need to be pushed 'cause that is how people reminded each other, just because they loved you.

and the funniest part is a friend posted this on her fb afterwards and it made my night, just for laugh people. Nite! Sweet Dreams.

‎- How do you expect kids to listen to their parents as, Tarzan lives half naked, Cinderella comes back home at midnight, Pinocchio lies all the time, Aladdin is the king of thieves, Batman drives at 320KM/h, Sleeping beauty is lazy and Snow white lives with 7 guys. We shouldn’t be surprised if kids misbehave at times! They get this from their own storybooks :D

I want to be Cinderella, a prince will come sweeping off her floor :P

Monday, April 18, 2011

The Land Down Under

These past 2 weeks, I've been bombarded by series of events. some are good, some are like you've been thrown by ice to your face. Ouch! and times like these, made you realized how much you miss the Land Down Under. 

Yep, I do miss Perth, Western Australia, Australia sometimes. but I'm not going to blog on Perth nor Australia, but I'd like to say that not only I've got my certificate with me, I tagged along some experiences in life, I could not find anywhere else in the world. and I've been blessed by given the opportunity to explore it.  It's true when they said, you can see Islam in the western countries, because I've seen it myself. I'm not going to brag on Australia, but if you have the opportunity to go out from your country for awhile, you'd realize how fortunate you are to have people that you love surrounding you and the things you've been complaining wasn't that a big of deal, and yeah! Australia is such a nice and beautiful country to visit :) Thank you Allah for the opportunity You've given me.

and of course, when I do miss Perth, besides, keeping in touch with friends and family in Perth, I'd watch this one particular video. and I'd laugh myself out and cried a little. If you happen to know Australia, you'd probably get the joke, and excuse me for the language, hope you'd enjoy the video as much as I do :)

and these few days, I've been following, if you've heard him before matluthi90, he happens to be an archi student in my former Uni, Curtin Uni of Tech, WA, if I'm not mistaken. unfortunately, after watching several videos of him, made me miss Perth, even more.

Ah! I miss Perth! :P
missing Perth leads me to fill up a form that I think would change my life once again. Kalau ada rezeki, ada lah :)

Kalau ada rezeki, ada kelapangan, ada umur yang panjang, go travel and see the world, SubhanAllah, you'll be surprise, what you'll get.

I do love my country very much, don't get me wrong, but...

Oh! fly me to the land far far away, even if it's a dream :)

One fine day, I'll show you, whoever you are, the place that taught me life is freaking hard, but pleasant at the same time. I've got to show Mummy and Daddy last time, this is the place, that taught me things I've now become, this is the place where I used to study, this is the place where I play and eat and go to sleep, this is the place that gives me comfort, this is the place where I'd like to shop..and this is the place I fell in love.

Take care everyone! No worries, mate :)

Malaysia, you've got idea, how much I love you! 

But the best part of missing Australia is that missing this kid, from crying, sulking-moments, potty training to now I could jump on her bed and talk girlie stuffs with her. How time flies.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

More precious than gold

I was trying a few clothes (Jubah) tonight when Mummy showed me a piece of paper cutting she'd like to keep. and immediately I wanted to share it with you guys.

This is to all the lovely women in the world, who's beautiful inside out. You know you're worth it :)
More precious than gold
by; Bulbir Singh, Seremban

I LIKED what Dzireena Mahadzir said in When less is more (Sense of Style, Trends, StarMag, June 27). She said much about women that I appreciate, especially about how women should dress, behave and act.

What a woman wears and how she looks are not the be all and end all for women; how they behave and act and speak is vital, too. I appreciate a woman who is modestly dressed, well-behaved and well-mannered, too. not one who behaves like a man!

and I like a woman who cloaks herself in mystery - modesty is not just about covering up the hair. to me, a woman should be like a rare jewel, hard to come by. if you want to buy cheap products, go ahead, there are plenty. but remember, good things aren't cheap, and cheap things aren't good!

I have read in a book (More than a hero: Muhammad Ali's life lessons through his daughter's eyes) about the advice that boxer Muhammad Ali gave to one of his daughters, Hana Yasmeen, when she was younger. it seems that she came to visit him in his home wearing clothes that were not very modest. His daughter tells the story of how Ali reacted to her: "When we finally arrived, the chauffeur escorted my younger sister, Laila, and me up to my father's suite. as usual, he was hiding behind the door to scare us. we exchanged many hugs and kisses as we could possibly give in one day.

"My father took a good look at us. Then he sat me down in his lap and said something that I will never forget. He looked me straight in the eyes and said: "Hana, everything that God made valuable in the world is covered and hard to get to".

"Where do you find diamonds? deep down in the ground, covered and protected. where do you find pearls? deep down at the bottom of the ocean, covered up and protected in a beautiful shell. where do you find gold? way down in the mine, covered over with layers and layers of rocks. you've got to work hard to get to them"

"He looked at me with serious eyes; 'Your body is sacred. you're far more precious than diamonds and pearls, and you should be covered too"
Isn't it beautiful? MasyaAllah.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

One is better than two

Bagai terpanggil panggil untuk menulis tentang lelaki-perempuan.
Terasa macam budak sekolah yang pergi ke Girls' school only, cheerleader yang selalu tersenyum menyorak pasukan bola sekolah dan BFF yang duduk having girls' talk sambil menyirup a cup of coffee.

Cliche-nya orang kata, kaum laki-laki ini gagah fizikalnya dan dalamannya. kaum laki laki tidak boleh menangis buruk rupanya. kaum laki laki itu, kaum laki laki ini. Personally I think it's OK to weep and cry a little, after all, men are human beings too. We are all have feelings.

Frankly speaking, I like reading articles on Guys. but up until now, I have zero knowledge on them, makin clueless ada lah! Been keeping this entry in draft for a week, and I guess I'd like to share with you guys. came across this article a week ago also and love-ing it. Oh! I love reading on  how guys will go head over hills over a girl he loves. seeing them go crazy reminded me how crazy love could be.

Dia sedang duduk mencangkung, di tangan kanannya tersisip rokok Marlboro Merah, masih menyala, sentiasa ada asap kelihatan terlepas dari hujung rokok itu. Di tangan kirinya, ada seberkas rumput. Hujung rumput itu diselaputi tanah, ada kelihatan akar berselirat pada gumpalan tanah yang melekat itu.

Cabut rumput ke San?”, aku berbasa basi. Dia buat bodoh, matanya masih pada rumput-rumput itu. Dibuangnya rumput yang digenggamnya tadi ke belakangnya, di situ, ada timbunan rumput lain. Habis saja mencabut seberkas rumput lain, dan membuangnya ke timbunan rumput tadi, dia berhenti. Rokok yang tersisip di celahan jarinya tadi, beralih tempat, kini di celahan bibirnya pula. Hitam saja warna bibirnya itu.

Woi San!! Cabut rumput ke??!”, aku jerit sikit, bagi dia dengar. Kemudian, dia selak rambut gondrongnya, terserlah headphone yang mendiam di telinganya. “Cilake kau San!”, aku terjerit kecil.

Apa dia tadi?”, dia pandang aku, bertanya sekaligus menanggalkan sedikit headphonenya. “Aku tanya, kau dah kahwin ke belum!!!”, aku beliakkan mata, niat memerlinya tadi jadi perkara lain pula. “Shit, aku dah salah tanya soalan.”, gumam aku dalam hati.

Hasan diam. Dia teruskan mencangkung. Dia cuma memakai seluar pendek berwarna putih, cukup-cukup menutupi lutut, itupun kalau dia berdiri, tapi sebab dia mencangkung sekarang, pahanya terdedah. Di tubuhnya, disarung baju warna hitam bertintakan Led Zeppelin. Aku senyum, mamat ni dengan Led Zep memang tak lari. Dia teruskan aktivitinya, dan aku cuma diam, terkedu dengan kesalahan sendiri.

Lebih kurang 10 minit dia diam, dan selama itu jugalah aku tak berganjak dari tempat aku. Menunggu lelaki yang lebih tua 5 tahun dari aku ini memulakan bicara, pe’elnya memang begini, diam kalau ada apa-apa yang mengganggu jiwanya, maka itu aku tunggu dia cakap dulu.

Im..”, mulutnya mula terbuka, tapi sikit saja, sebab dibibirnya masih tersisip rokok, rokok yang baru dinyalakan tadi, “Cinta ni kan Im, macam rumput inilah.”. Jari telunjuknya dikeluarkan dari genggamannya, seraya menunjukkan rumput yang meninggi, lebih tinggi berbanding rumput-rumput lain. “Dia bila dah tinggi mencanak macam ni, susah nak cabut Im, susah..”, nadanya jadi bergetar.

Kau try cabut sini kalau tak percaya”. Dia panggil aku dengan jemarinya yang seakan menari. “Ok!”, aku jerit kecil. Sampai di depan rumput tu, aku pandang Hasan, mata aku bagi isyarat, “Ini je San?”, dia cuma angguk dan lemparkan aku senyum sinis, wajahnya tak berapa jelas sebab ditutup asap rokok. Aku cangkung, dan cuba cabut, tak dapat, dia gelakkan aku. Aku cuba lagi, gagal lagi, dan diketawakan lagi. 5 kali aku cuba, 5 kali aku gagal, dan 5 kali aku diketawakan. Aku pasrah.

Kau boleh cabut Im”, dia kata lepas habis gelak. “Tapi kau kena pakai cangkul itulah”. Dia tunjukkan cangkul yang terbaring di tepi jalan bertar dekat rumah kami. Ke arah kanan, jalan bertar itu memanjang ke atas bukit, selepas melepasi dua buah rumah lagi sebelum berselirat menuju kampung-kampung lain. Ke arah kiri pula, ianya mendatar, melepasi beberapa buah rumah, sebuah gerai kecil milik jiran, dan terus membawa penggunanya keluar ke pekan.

Aku ambil cangkul itu, dan tak sampai 5 minit, rumput yang tadi megah berdiri mengatasi rumput-rumput lain bersemadi di genggaman aku. Aku senyum, puas. Tak sedar yang aku sedang membahu cangkul yang beratnya beberapa kilogram. Kepuasan mengatasi segalanya. Heh.

Hasan cuma senyum. Dia duduk di atas tanah bekas rumput tadi. Dia pandang aku yang sedang berdiri, dibibirnya sudah lekang dari rokok, kerana rokok tadi, mendiam pula dicelahan jemarinya. Tak habis-habis dengan rokoknya, dengan Led Zepnya, bisik hati aku. Aku lihat Hasan cuma senyum, sinis.

Kau tengok rumput tu, ada akar tak”, aku belek-belek rumput di genggaman aku ni bila dia cakap macam tu, lepas tu aku geleng kepala. “Sebab itulah aku cakap, cinta ni macam rumput Im”. Hasan mula duduk dengan betul, ditepuk-tepuk bontotnya, digagau-gagau pula poket tepi kirinya, kemudian dia keluarkan sebatang lighter dan sebatang rokok lain. Hujung rokok dan lighter tadi dicumbu, sesaat saja, dan rokok tadi menyala. Tanpa lengah, dicucuh pula bibirnya dengan rokok itu.

Kau tahu, bila kau cabut rumput tu, tanpa akar, rumput tu akan tumbuh balik”, dia mula bercakap dengan rokok disisip pada bibir, “Macam juga cinta, kalau kau cabut perasaan cinta kau tu, tanpa kau cabut akar-akarnya sekali, kiranya sia-sia, sebab…”, dia diam sekejap, fikir aku, mesti dia ingat perempuan tu. “Sebab perasaan cinta kau, akan kekal di situ, dekat hati kau.”. Jari yang disisipkan rokok dihala pada dada ku, sebelum dia sambung bermadah, “Jadi, macam mana kau cuba cabut pun cinta kau tu, kau date dengan perempuan lain ke apa, kau tahu itu sia-sia, sebab cinta kau, cuma pada perempuan tu seorang”, dia hembuskan asap rokoknya, berkepul-kepul huruf O terhasil,

Dia seorang….

Dia diam, matanya ada pada awan, ada pada langit, jiwanya juga begitu aku rasa. Aku perasan, ada air mata bergenang. Dia tunduk, jatuhlah setitis dua, kemudian digosok-gosok matanya. “Cilaka kereta tadi, main hembus asap karbon monoksida lak kata mata aku, berair terus”, dia bagi alasan. Aku cuma senyum.

Kau masih ingat dia ke San?” aku tanya, dia pandang aku, kemudian dia tanya, “Kau dengan Siti macam mana, kau dah lupa kat dia?”, dia pulang paku buah keras kat aku. Sial, macam mana dia tahu ni, aku jerit dalam hati, “Kau baca blog aku San?”, aku tanya dia. Dia berdiri, buat bodoh dengan soalan aku. Dia arahkan kakinya ke arah timbunan rumput tadi. Dah, jom tolong aku, cepat!! Jeritnya sambil memeluk rumput yang dah dicabut tadi dan kemudian berjalan ke arah tempat bakar sampah.

Aku bergegas, tapi aku perasan aku pijak sesuatu, aku tengok ada dompet, terbuka, ada gambar Hasan. Ada gambar perempuan. Ini.. perempuan tu.. Aku senyum lagi. “Kau tak payah jawab soalan aku San, gambar ni dah jawab dah”, aku bisik dalam hati.

Sambil membakar rumput-rumput tadi, aku pandang awan, dan aku terlihat Siti. Tiba-tiba mata aku pun kena hembus karbon monoksida. Demmit.
Taken from terfaktab.blogspot.com through their penulis jemputan SastraBoy. Rumput rumput Cinta - Writing yang best.
Like I said, It's a good feeling when reading sth like this, I can be pretty amazed when a guy likes a girl. some will say, it's plain boring, too emotional. some will suggest, carik yang lain, and I'd simply say that I could bet my life that this guy, yang tinggi angan angan nya wouldn't dare.

Tapi Sayang, yeh two is better than one, orang kata lah tp sometimes, one is better than two "Dia Seorang"

Monday, April 11, 2011

Daddy's day dan White Veil Occasion

I've got two weddings on last Sunday (10th April), but managed to only go to one of the weddings.
Fana is my best friend when we were in UPM and still is. We ended up being closest friends when we were in last year in UPM when me, Fana, Shira, Sally and Molie, were supervised by the same supervisor, Dr. Mano.  I still remembered how we were punished, and scolded by him, and deep down he wanted us to succeed. How time flies, Molie is now married and just gave birth to a handsome boy, Fana just got married to her love of her life, tinggal tiga orang je lagi ni :P

I tagged along BFF to the wedding, it was pretty simple yet overwhelming. you know, when two people is in love, you could tell? I am so happy for Fana, after all she's been through, May happiness will always be with you dear. Got to meet Shira, Zamakh and his wife, Aniq and his wife. everyone is all grown up. Awwwwww.

I guess, when you got something else better to do other than love, you get married :P
Here some of the pictures, congrats again dear :) Moga kekal hingga ke syurga :)

Today (11th of April) is Daddy's birthday. Since it's Monday and he's working, we've already celebrated on last Saturday lagipun, Wanie and Atie were home. 

Daddy dear, nobody's perfect but you are closest to perfect. I could not ask for anyone else to be my daddy,  mati hidup semula pon I cannot re-pay you, you're the bestest Dad I could ever asked. you taught me to be blessed for the air that i breath and the things that I've got. Happy Birthday daddy dear, moga di panjangkan umur dan dimurahkan rezeki, Indeed, you're old, please take care. 

I was touched when daddy replied my msg. He wanted his children to be a good Muslimah, not the noun, not the capital M, but the small m, the verb, InsyaAllah.

PS it'd be really cool if I could find someone like daddy. you don't have to be pakar ekonomi, daddy treats us good plus he has a stand, that no matter what, he will firmly believes he can. I love you dearly daddy!


AH! Aku BENCI KAU! Sungguh!

Thursday, April 7, 2011

It's So Hard

I should be preparing for tomorrow but here I am blogging. I was cleaning up my room today, and each time I clean my room up, I'll read my favourite poem, folded it on a piece of paper. and each time I read it, I'll have the same exact feeling. Care to join? :P

It's from Becca Woolf
It's So Hard

It's so hard to say "I love you", and not draw back in tears,
It's so hard to know that you're not there to help me face my fears,
It's so hard to know the phone's at reach, but I cannot hear your voice,
It's so hard to know that this time breaking up was not my choice,
It's so hard to see you laughing when I'm crying deep inside,
It's so hard to just find feelings and now have to make them hide,
It's so hard to live without you, when I need you more than words,
To want to scream how much I love you but hold back and not be heard,
It's so hard to go to sleep when I cannot dream of you,
It's so hard to think that you might fall in love with someone new,
It's so hard to not start crying when I hear your favourite song,
It's so hard to sit and wonder, where did I go wrong?
It's so hard to live without you, if I only would have known,
I will never love another, I would rather be alone.

probably it has to do with bukan senang untuk menjadi senang :)

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

CUN! Movie

Hari ini aku dibebel lagi oleh mama "suka sangat pergi tempat lagha tuh, nak rahmat Allah kenelah tinggalkan semua itu, nak rezeki dari Allah kenelah seimbang"

Aku senyap sahaja, deep down I know mama patut marah, she loves me to death, I took her hands and cium minta maaf.

Today I went to Alamanda to watch Cun! with BFF, aku guna alasan mahu fotostat itu ini untuk hari Jumaat ini, sememangnya aku sangat serabut untuk hari Jumaat ini. This morning I woke up crying again, rindu barangkali, so I decided to go out.

Cun!, cerita melayu yang biasa biasa sahaja. setakat mahu gelak gelak, suka suka, boleh lah. tapi ended up aku menangis juga. Well, if you know me that well, aku memang kuat menangis pun. Tak boleh tahan lah part Remy Ishak cakap, aku orang kampung sahaja, memang tak setanding dengan kamera kau yang banyak, memang banyak pon tapi ingat kau banyak duit boleh buat sesuka hati.

Mungkin juga sebab aku suka sangat dengan Maya Karin, aku pergi tengok. Cun! ini cerita tentang budak kampung ingin bercinta dengan budak bandar. Eh! banyak juga pesanan yang boleh didapati dari cerita ini seperti, orang bandar patut kurangkan guna energy untuk elak global warming and climate change, lagi satu, orang kampung pon kene kurangkan guna pesticide yang tidak organic.

Selain aku cuba untuk selam selam cerita ini, aku suka bila BFF komen "mungkin benda benda ini terjadi pada artis artis kita, realitynya; kawen kontrak, sponsor, dan lain lain"

"Ah! Siapa kata KLCC tak padan dengan sawah padi?" 

I've told you once and I'm going to tell you again "Buat tindakan jangan ikut emosi sahaja"

Forbidden Love

"We always long for the forbidden things, and desired what is denied us"

"Love forbids you not to love"

"The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love someone else"

"For all sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are these "It might have been"


"Things forbidden have a secret charm"

AH! sangat tempting, tak tipu, tapi mungkin ada hikmahNya :)

Monday, April 4, 2011

Stop searching forever, happiness is just next to you..

If not now, then when?
If not here, then where?
If not this, then what?
If not you, then who? :P
(thingsweforget, 2011)

Nah,I haven't found the one yet, I'm just saying that, probably in the search of 'the one', you don't need to migrate to another states or even to another country cause you might never know, she or he is so near to you.

oh! I wish for you on a falling star, wondering where you are, do I ever cross your mind, in a warm sunshine? :P where art thou? 

have you seen this star? :P
(tuk menggapai bintang, terangi hidupku)

True Wealth

Secara jujurnya, I hate the word wealth. Kaya? Ada apa dengan kaya? Jangan kawan dia, dia anak orang kaya. Mesti bahagiakan dia jadi orang kaya. dia mesti nak kawan dengan orang-orang kaya saja, yang miskin macam kita, dia mesti tak nak kawan. Bolehlah dia beli barang itu ini, pergi sana sini, dia kaya, tak macam kita. Alah, bukan duit dia pon, duit ayah dia, ayah dia yang kaya.

Apa kau tahu manusia? bercakap tak pandang kiri kanan? tak semena siang atau malam? and I don't think you'd want to be in my shoes either.

but frankly speaking, aku lagi benci poverty dari wealth. aku pernah ikut ayah masuk bandar keluar bandar, masuk kampung keluar kampung untuk kajian kemiskinan, dan aku benci kemiskinan. deep down, aku tahu mereka hidup bahagia (yang di kampung walaupun kais pagi makan pagi) tapi aku mahu tolong mereka keluar dari garis kemiskinan, aku percaya boleh, tapi apakan daya. Di bandar pula lain ceritanya, menggigil aku tatkala ayah berada disisi apabila masuk ke kawasan 'urban poverty' ini. kotaraya yang ku puja, rupanya indah khabar dari rupa. banyak lagi orang kita, orang melayu kita yang hidup susah di ibu kota. doakan aku berjaya sambung belajar dengan tajuk ini :D

I once heard that True Wealth is Family, friends and Health. 

Aku bersyukur dikurniakan family yang amat memahami aku. Yes, we do have ups and downs tapi air dicincang tak akan putus right? Family comes first, sayangilah family anda sebab when the world turns their back on you, you can count on your family, that's for sure.

kawan kawan, friends. aku ada kawan, yang suka nak berkawan dengan semua orang, bagi dia, dia akan bahagia kalau ada ramai kawan. I don't think that way, Yes true, berkawan biar beribu, musuh jangan di cari, tapi bagi aku, kawan kawan ini quality bukan quantity. Aku mencari sahabat bukan kawan tikam belakang.  Dr. HM Tuah pernah cerita, kau mungkin sampai mati pon tidak akan dapat cari sahabat sejati, tapi bagi aku nothing is impossible. Aku tahu dia diluar sana yang akan faham aku luar dalam. Tapi buat masa ini, I've found some great friends and you know who you are :D

Health. kesihatan. Physically and mentally. Tolonglah jaga kesihatan anda semua from now on. kelak tua merana, sekarang pon boleh rasa sakit sakit nya.

Waking up early in the morning dengan perasaan bersyukur for everything that I've got cause I know Allah boleh tarik bila bila masa sahaja. Blessed :) 

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Lat Kampung Boy Sebuah Muzikal

Image source: google

Last night, April 2nd, 2011, Saturday, went to Istana Budaya with 6 other pretty girls, to watch Lat Kampung Boy Sebuah Muzikal. This was my 3rd time going to IB and 2nd time this year and Lat Kampung Boy Sebuah Muzikal has it's own way in capturing my heart last night. Two words : Super Awesome.

It started when Lat (most probably short form of BU-LAT) at Kampung, who likes to draw whenever and whatever he sees. He's being scolded by his mom because of it, the funniest part when he drew their house atas lantai rumah sendiri, how he adores their house and his kampung very much. His father who has a huge impact on him, likes to bring back used papers so that Lat could draw. His father also taught him that, kaum lelaki harus kuat sebab itu John Wayne tak nangis.

At school, Lat being laughed because of his angan-angan dan berangan. I like the lyrics of the Dalam Gila ada Rahsia when Nora sang the part "Lat, awak ini memang pelik, awak nombor satu bab merepek, hiduplah di dunia nyata, lukisan awak tak kemana". but that doesn't bring him down, he kept on drawing and imagining things, monsters and cowboy.

Luckily, his dad got promoted and they moved to Ipoh. There Lat met some supportive people like Mrs Hew  and his friend, Frankie who supported him and his drawing and they think that Lat can go far with his drawings. One of Mrs' Hew favourite quote is DWYL and LWYD "Do what you love and Love what you do".

Later on he moved to KL and worked at one of the local newspaper and met Pae (Faezah).

the rest of the story you have to watch it for yourself or at least read the comics by Dato' Lat himself.

thumbs up for barisan pelakon and di belakang tabir. you guys rock big times. I really like the joke from Frankie where he said (no offense for orang buta) but he made a joke on orang buta yang bawa kereta di KL and patutlah KL jammed. he probably wanted to say that please be considerate while driving and look right and left.

I also like the part where Frankie said that " you can take the boy out of the pekan but you cannot take the pekan out of the boy".

Oh! I've got a lot to say. but basically it's about ups and downs of a person's life. How he battled with his own feelings, when his father died, when he met Pae, when he cannot juggle his work and his family and most probably the fame that he got.

Overall, do what you love and love what you do, follow your heart and see where it leads you. at the same time, jangan sampai kacang lupakan kulit. 

"Mama, nak kawen dengan budak arts boleh?" :P

Friday, April 1, 2011

How I met your Father..

This is a story on how I met your father. Just kidding.

Well, on Dec last year, a dear friend of mine asked me to blog on him. I barely know him, even though I've got a lot to blog on him, but I waited a bit more, just in case, all of my writings in the end, make sense. But you know how things could turn around, go different directions, what you've planned didn't go as planned. How fate got twisted in the middle of things and even though I've got no idea what the future holds for both of us, here I am, blogging on you, as promised :)

This time around a year ago

Met you a year ago, get to know you better for 8 months, you brought joy even for a short period of time, take care dear friend :)

Never regret you, never regret us~ NEVER!